Uncategorized

Happy Heavenly Birthday

 

img_5346On March 14, 2017 I lost my best friend to leukemia. Today is her first heavenly birthday. Today we celebrate her life while we continue to miss her daily.  When Ami turned 40 she was still very sick and we always talked about how we would celebrate her big birthday as soon as she was well enough to celebrate big. We talked about taking a trip to the beach since she loved the beach. That celebration never happened, but I know that the celebration she is having in Heaven today is beyond anything we could have dreamed of here on earth. Today I would like to share the words I wrote on the day that we lost Ami.  It sums up all of my emotions and thoughts.  I love you, Ami Paige Brown!

 

Written March 14, 2017.

I have been in a state of shock today and I haven’t really known what to say even though I want to say something before this day ends. I want you to know that I truly believed that Ami would always make it through and that she would always be here with us. I could not sleep last night after I found out she had taken a turn and was placed in ICU. There was something in my heart and in my gut that felt sick. My husband and I held hands and prayed and asked God to please heal Ami’s body and cover her in His protection. Paul knew I couldn’t sleep because I was so worried so he reminded me at 12:30am that Ami’s life is in God’s hands and we have to put complete trust in Him.

I woke this morning feeling anxious because I was not able to make contact with anyone to update about what was going on with Ami. I had checked my phone every hour on the hour all night long and I was starting to get more worried. When I learned that Ami was no longer with us, I fell to my knees and cried harder than I think I’ve ever cried. I felt so upset at God because I just didn’t understand why He had to take her. She had her whole life ahead of her and she has three kids who need their mommy.

Needless to say, it has been a difficult day, but I know God’s plans are not our plans and His ways are not our ways. I am going to keep looking to Him and trusting in Him with every ounce of my being because I have to give it all to Him. He chose to bring Ami home today, and even though I will never understand it, I do know that I will get to see my sweet friend again when we join her in heaven one day.

My heart had been hurting deeply knowing that Ami was in so much pain. I prayed God to please ease her pain and give her peace. Ami is free from all sickness and she is no longer in pain. I know she was excited to see her Ninny and Walley and many more loved ones today. I’m sure they are all rejoicing together. I will remind myself daily that we will see Ami again one day.

img_6880-1img_6879-1

I want to share a little bit about Ami so that each of you who have never met her in person can have a glimpse into the amazing human that she was. Ami loved Jesus and she loved her sweet church family who provided so much support for her and her family the past three years. She was a wife, mom, sister, aunt, daughter, daughter-in-law, sister-in-law, granddaughter, cousin, friend, and so much more. She was truly loved by everyone who had the chance to know her.  She loved her family and especially her three kids, Whit, Chandler, and Beckett. Those three were her entire life.

Ami would always make me laugh because she is the only person I know who worried more than me. Ami loved to keep things and she had a difficult time throwing away items especially anything that had any ounce of sentimental value including toys and baby clothes. I would try to help Ami organize and clean even though it was always overwhelming with the amount of stuff she had. One of the last times I helped with the organizing and cleaning, she pulled out a bunch of plastic tubs to sort through only to realize after we had sorted them that they were the same tubs we had organized, sorted, and labeled a month earlier. We have laughed a lot about that day.

img_6889img_6888img_6892

Ami had a heart of gold. She was a Special Education Teacher at Jenks Public Schools and she loved working with her kids. I remember the day after she was diagnosed one of her former students came to visit her in the hospital. She made an impact on so many lives and she left a legacy that will never be forgotten and will live on in her children.

img_5351Ami was compassionate, caring, loving, generous, and truly the strongest, bravest person I have ever known. She stood up against this sickness with fist in the air and she fought the toughest fight of her life. She has been through hell and back since June 19, 2014 and I’m thankful she doesn’t have to go through anymore of this fight. Some would say she lost the fight, but I think she won because she is forever standing glorious with our Heavenly Father and we will all get to see her again one day.

Ami was my best friend and I will never forget her friendship, her sweet smile, her laugh, or her love for anything related to vampires.;) My heart is broken because I can’t pick up the phone to call my friend or run over to her house to see her for a minute. I miss my brave and mighty Ami. I don’t know how long this sadness will last, but I’m going to do my best to keep your spirit and memory alive.

img_6890img_0638
My heart is not only sad for my loss but my heart has a deeper sadness for Ami’s family. Ami was like a sister to me and her family was just like family. Please pray for God to cover Ami’s family in a peace that passes all understanding. Pray for her husband, Kyle C Brown, and their three children. Please pray for her sister Kari Whitlow Purdie and her husband and their two children. Please pray for her dad and her mom because I can’t imagine the pain they are experiencing losing their daughter. Please pray for her brother, Zach, and her sweet grandmother and many aunts and cousins all over who love her and have been by her side every step of the way.

img_6878
Ami Whitlow-brown, you are forever loved! I miss you so much already and I will never forget the lifetime of memories we have made in 24 years of friendship. I love you always! ❤️

img_6884img_6893img_6885img_6877img_6887-1

img_0626img_0627img_0630

Happy Heavenly Birthday! I hope you are having the most wonderful heavenly birthday celebration today. xoxo

 

13 thoughts on “Happy Heavenly Birthday

      1. Halley,
        I have no idea how I came across this story, but my LinkedIn (?) somehow lead me here. I am so sorry for your loss. I just lost my father a month ago and just like you said, I find comfort in the fact he found Christ and is with him, today. What I knew about Ami, was a pretty amazing woman. I never got to tell you congratulations on getting married. From your story, he seems like an amazing man. You were also right about LifeChurch. I’ve been playing on the praise and worship team since 2013. Thank you for an amazing read.
        Take care and God Bless,

        Jason Shelor

        Like

  1. Ami is bright & so it makes sense to me that she would attract your light too. Like attracts like. You my dear are a reflection of her beautifully shining spirit. I’m so grateful to have met you Halley.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. My dear friend! This has me in tears. Ami was a blessing to everyone who knew her. I was blessed to be her friend . I, too, am so grateful that I met you. You are a gem! In the heartache of losing Ami there are blessings and she brought so many lives together and connected so many friends through it all. I hope we can all plan to get together again soon. xoxo

      Like

    1. Thank you so much for taking the time to read this post about Ami. That means a lot! 💚 I remind myself daily that she is rejoicing with our Heavenly Father and we will see her and all of our loved ones again one day. 🙌🏻
      Btw, this was my first official public blog post. I am also new to this whole world of blogging but I knew that yesterday was the day to jump in and go for it. I wanted to honor Ami and have her legacy be a part of this blog. Thank you for taking the time to read it.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Congrats to you, too! 🙂 It’s funny that we both jumped into the world of blogging at the same time. Thank you for your kind words. I love how God brings friends together in such unique ways. He’s a good, good Father. ❤️

        Liked by 1 person

  2. I see the joy in both of you when your together. All the pictures on its own made me smile. She’ll always be with you just not physically. I pray that you stay strong Halley.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much! Your words are very dear. She was full of joy and always smiling even in her darkest days. She was always a light. You are so right… she is always with me. I was just telling someone tonight that I prefer not to visit the cemetery because I feel like she’s with me in my hear every day. Thank you for taking the time to ready post and comment. ❤️

      Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s